Ding dong, the worlds gone mad.

Basically, i'm about to write something that lots of people are going to hate, probably most of America are gonna hate me for writing this.

So yeah, unless you've been living in a cave for the last few hours you will know that Osama Bin Laden is dead. For all of you who haven't heard of him, where the fuck have you been... I mean, he's the former leader of the terrorist organisation Al-Qaeda - literally translated as the database.

I'm not about to support what this man has done and what he ordered. But what i will take into question is the way this whole thing is being handled, and a few things that people should take into account before people start loosing their heads over this.

1. Yes, this man killed many many thousands of people, he proclaimed a jihad on American, the UK and their allies. Just to let you know, i am a white caucasian british citizen, i have lived here all my life, as have my family. I have been baptised into the Christian faith, but i do not consider myself to be some form of uber-Christian. However this man has been highly inactive for a large number of years. Al-Qaeda is not run by him, he is just a figure head. His death will simply lessen the morale, if he is dead at all. I mean, he appears to be, and i'll put this bluntly, dumped over a boat into some sea. Truly dignified. And if he is dead how profane can you get?

2. The reaction to his death is completely unacceptable. People wonder why terrorists have reason to attack people. When i see facebook status like 'See you in hell Osama, that is if hell is real. You took that game of hide and seek too far. I hope your being tortured in unspeakable ways right now. :) for all eternity may I add.' and 'hopes the bastard rots in hell. Near a Pakistani army base? Go figure.' are disgraceful. Yes he is a murderer, but what the fuck has he ever done to you? I mean seriously! I can understand why the families of the 9/11, or the 7/7 dead may have reason to hate him, but your average joe, not a chance.

3. Many people are hailing this as a great day for Christianity. Why don't those of you who do do this take a leaf out of your own book. See Matthew 5:39. 'But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.' Yes, he hurt you, but turn the other cheek, learn to forgive, but i fear this is something the americans will never be able to do. The Vatican clearly feel the same way as i do, as they have released at statement that this mans death should not be rejoiced: http://www.catholicherald.co.uk/news/2011/05/02/christians-should-not-rejoice-at-death-of-osama-bin-laden-says-vatican-spokesman/, so yeah, go figure.

4. Perhaps this is too naive on my behalf, but people should celebrate peoples lives, not their deaths. We should be celebrating the lives of men like Sir Henry Cooper, or whispering Ted Lowe, people who did some good in this life.

5. This is something that surprised me a first, and then i realised that its probably more widespread than i thought. The question on my mind were, what the fuck were those americans doing in Pakistan? Seriously. They're not even anywhere near the border, they're closer to India than Afghanistan! Its a joke! I mean seriously! America, do yourself a favour and stay out of countries that arn't your own! Yes you can argue that you would have never caught Bin Laden if you hadn't, but thats no excuse, he would have slipped up eventually, or you could have been less obvious and said you found the body in Afghanistan or Iraq.

6. This list is getting long. http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2001/oct/17/afghanistan.terrorism11
Read that. Think of the decade of war that could have been avoided if the US had chosen to except that. But no, its government decided it 'wanted the oil'. Bullshit, it just wanted to show the russians its muscles some more. The cold war is over America, you won, we know, now start doing something useful like helping the chinese get the world out of the economic crisis it is in, or perhaps look after your own people in alabama, or the japanese survivors of the earthquake and tsunami.

Dude.

So theres my rant, no doubt i will remember something else in a minute. But yeah, America, stop being ridiculously stupid, and stop celebrating, unless you want a 911 times a thousand to quote team america. Because that is literally exactly what you're doing right now, playing into the hands of people who hate you.

7. This war has been going on for longer than there has even been an America, so if you think you can just jump in and solve it, much like you guys supposedly did in WW2, then you are so, so wrong. East and West have been fighting since 1000 BC if not before, the greeks fought against the Persians, in the same way that you are now fighting against the Arabs. America, you need to open your eyes and realise everyone, even your allies, think you are such pricks.

No doubt the FBI will be on my ass as soon as i post this. So if i dont post again, then yeah, tell the world what happened. Perhaps i wont be allowed into america later this year on a family holiday, no doubt they'll still be celebrating Bin Ladens death then.

Another thing that gets at me is that now Obama is almost certainly going to win the next election, all he has to say is i killed Bin Laden and the south, and probably most of the north will go woo lets vote for him who got lucky one weekend but appart from that did fuck all yeah....

If you guys are wondering, the labels for my post to day are tunes i listened to whilst writing this up.

I'll pay some lucky lady to rub some of this sweat more cream on me.

Sup Ladies,

Anyway, no replies as of yet to last nights blog post, it was as i suspected. Nobody, literally nobody reads this shit. Haha, anyway.

Went shopping today and bought a load of clothes, because i really really needed some new clothes. My old clothes are shit, and fucked up due to 2 years of wearing them. They're also real small, because i used to be a bit of a short fat weed. Found the most awesome t shirt of all time which i am looking forward to wearing to a mates 19th. But yeah, was quite a good day, had another day where i did no revision, im going to fail these exams. Hit the gym, like a boss, sweated out like i usually do, have been looking for a way to loose the fat around my stomach, because i dont sweat there as much and im starting to look very disproportional, riped chest and legs, and a bit of a beer belly. I don't even drink that much, and underneath it i know i'd have at least a 6 pack (you can see the 4 pack through the layer of fat i have round my stomach). The other issue is, the more sit ups i do the fatter i get, because the muscle pushes the fat out, this is why six packs are definitive. Still, fucking annoying. So if anyone knows anyway to loose stomach fat, or if the creams that make you sweat actually work, then please let me know, because i will take you up on it.

So, basically i can't do this without discussing the royal wedding.
Um, its tomorrow, Kate Middleton deserves to fuck a real man, such as myself, but yeah, good luck to them, hope it works out for them. And yeah, enjoy. I will be getting up for it at 8.30 tomorrow morning, simply because it'll be at least 30 years before i see another one, and because i'm a bit of a royalist at heart. Either that or i hate the French.

So yeah, i hope everyone has fun tomorrow, and yeah, please please please reply to my stuff if you have any answers to my questions. And if you don't, well say hi anyway, because yeah, you might even get a mention.

J

And if you were wondering, the labels for each of my posts are the tv shows i watched whilst typing this up. It'll give you all some idea of what i like to watch on the tele. And yeah, the best thing on the tv at the moment is the walking dead on 5 on sunday nights, its really really good, its a zombie tv show that is genuinely awesome. Watch it bitches!

Welcome back

So yeah,

Basically the last blog i did basically stopped. I never managed to do anything to it, and it sucked so bad. I also didn't want any of my friends reading it, which only did damage to my friendship and made me look like a dick.

So yeah, its more than 2 years since i started doing this, but yeah thought i'd start again.

Watching some My Name is Earl, one of the best shows on TV. Miss it loads, real shame it got cancelled back in 2009.

Basically hears a run down of my life at the moment:

I'm 6'3". I way 15 stone 10.5 pounds. My favourite part of my body is the muscle above me knees from all the cycling i've been doing. It takes me longer to do my hair in the morning than it does to get dressed. I can wear almost any colour, no im not being ridiculous, i actually can. I suffer hyperhydrosis. My passtimes are going to the gym, gaming and going out. I try to go out once a week, but it often doesnt happen. Twice a week is practically unheard of, mainly because i drink lots, and booze isnt cheap. I'm looking for a relationship, there are some girls on my mind. The one who never leaves my mind, who i think of more than most is almost 10 years older than me, and she's known me since i was 13, since she graduated from Cambridge. I'm not sure the best way to ask her out, i might text her see if she wants a pint. I might not, i might try and bump into her somewhere or something. I havent seen her for nearly a year, but we talk, and i used to see her a lot when i wasn't a uni. Still, some of you who know my will have guessed who it is.

I'm also looking for someone, preferably female, to go see water for elephants with, because 1, it looks good, 2, whatever people say, people with short back and sides hair are hot, i can varify this and 3. the trailer had cosmic love by florence and the machine which is a tune. I might ask the girl i just ranted on about, but cinema is never a good first date option. I also want to watch it because it'll remind me of Kelly, a previous almost conquest that i ruined by taking her on a first date to an indian restaurant.... with my parents and some friends, yes, i am foolish, and if you want to know how it'll remind me of her, basically, i watched the notebook with her, and its a really really soppy but amazing movie. We havent spoken since really, so yeah, im a dickhead. But yeah cinema first date option makes you look like a douche. Its a good 2nd or 3rd date. I think i might ask her if she wants to go for a drink. Not sure where, but yeah, will ask her. But again, not sure. Anyway the job that i might get is going to be shit, no thursday, friday, saturday or sunday nights. I might see if she can do a monday or something. Either that, or i might ask her out during my exam period. Instead of serving her students she can serve me. Ha.

Anyway, thats a huge, huge clue.


Anyway, if any of you want to drop me an email, then see my details, or if any of you want to come watch water for elephants. Thats an invitation to girls only by the way, last time i went to the cinema with another dude it was really gay. Really really gay. Almost as bad as going to watch a romance movie with you're family. The only movies that should be watched with family are things like Harry Potter, and only the ones with no kissing in them. So yeah, you probably all think i'm a fucking a retard having read this. And yeah, you love it.

Anyway, talk to you all soon.

J

It took me ages to take write this, and yeah, this wont be a regular thing, it might be, but im not going to be like oh yeah im going to update every wednesday. Fuck that, i'll update when i want.

I'm going to go and text that girl, see if she fancies a drink with me at some point. Though i'm not sure about texting her, she said she wanted to catch up at some point, but im not sure if texting is the right way to go about it. Please do let me know.